ok, so I am going to UCLA impatient on wed. yipp...eee... said with some sarcasm. treatment is soooooo expensive. But it's my life right? I'm worth this, right? OK course I am.. but its still a lot of moollla.

i cant even count the number of times I purged today. too many. But I did keep in the protein smoothie I made, and the frozen yogurt with the fixings. The second is to my disappointment. I was just too late in purging to get it out.

me going back inpatient is a blessing. Not just for the containment of the purging that got out of control but it just shows that under stress what did I do? I went back to purging. There are still issues that need dealt with. And I still need to learn how to eat like a normal person. ANd not binge, and purge, and starve. Or care so darn much about my weight. At UCLA I will get therapy three times a week which I am actually excited about. And its suppose to be an overall round the clock good program. I just hope its not like the other inpatient place where I have gone and the workers are younger then me. and like in their 20's. Grant it I am only 23 but still...

ok, my packing is 95% complete. Just have to load my bathroom stuff. And my car mostly loaded. I have to drive tomorrow morning to LA to pick up my dad, then we hang out at the hotel the rest of the afternoon till wed 8am I am admitted. I'm nervous......