Happy New Year 2010

And here are the some of the photos: I am the blonde in pink

New year equals fresh start. So far I am doing great. Went out with a double bang and them some last night, drinking and dancing with ole girl pals in my college town. Had a little fling on the side with some lovely cuddle time (happens to be my best friends male roommate..haha). It was a blast last night. I rocked a dress, guys bought me drinks and danced the new year away with me. The later equals males do in fact find me attractive and pleasant and sexy and cute. I need validation nights like last night every so often. Pictures will be posted later. Several of my group that went out for new years said that since I've put on a few pounds I look really good. And I trust their word. But when I got on the scale this am at Katie's house, it read 116lbs! Seriously, so I am not sure if I have in fact lost weight or its just her scale. I will of course check it in the am at my parents place (where I am living btw).

New start equals fresh start. Food wise and eating disorder wise, fresh start is implied. I haven't purged today! And I have eaten little meals through out the day. Day one= success!

New Year Resolutions/Goals

Thou shall not steal

Thou shall not purge via self induced vomiting

Thou shall run a marathon

Thou shall eat more locally grown food

Thou shall limit meat from diet

Thou shall pay back my parents one fourth of sum of loaned money

Thou shall graduate from University

Thou shall weigh 94lbs

120.5lbs this am

But I went snow shoeing with my dad this afternoon and it was a glorious day. I miss my CA weather... I did a small purge on friday afternoon (ate a bunch of halloween candy and felt the need to get rid of it). Other than that incident, I am having a blast at home living with my parents, and the holidays went smooth sailing. I am getting geared up for student teaching that starts in about a week and a half, after the new year on the 6th. I'm nervous about student teaching but excited to0. I'm eating alright, just want to get back into shape and feel good about my body. I am a bridesmaid in my older sisters wedding on the 20th of March 2010. I am trying to look trim, not sickly skinny like before, just firm and toned and flexible and have some muscles and weigh around 110-112lbs.

if it wasn't for my journaling and my blogging, I wouldn't know what to do. It's whats keeping me sane these days. I don't have therapy set up yet and I don't ever get a chance to process. So to bed I go.

happy christmas!

still no binge or purge, most importantly no purge. My last was on sunday December 20th. I regret though eating as much as I have been. Good thing I am not weighing myself other wise I think I would turn a trick and purge. Hooray for me